May it is!

Yesterday, I cleaned my room - where cleaning meant not only by sweeping and mopping but by removing all the stuff and wiping all the dusts that’s been sitting everywhere - after a year of ignoring it.

I decided to get rid of the book shelf whose duty was to display my nursing books and leftover school supplies but now is only gathering dusts. It also made me think of what to do with all those school stuffs which were eventually passed down to my sister who is still in high school.

That leaves me with the nursing books and notebooks. For the last time, I browsed my notes and got disappointed with what I saw. My hideous handwriting. Seriously, I would love to donate my notes to incoming 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th years but they will not be able to read what’s in there. I can barely even read it yesterday.
My already hideous handwriting plus time-pressured-note-copying equates to a physician-like prescription; unreadable.

I noticed an empty but small drawer in the other room and decided to use that one instead of the bulky book shelf and it’s much easier to clean too.
My nursing books and notebooks almost filled all four compartments leaving only a small space in each enough to store my non-nursing books.

I wasn’t sure until when will I keep those nursing stuff, unless I get rid of them, I will still be haunted by the degree I really don’t want. Until today, an image came to mind where I am burning my notebooks - only the notebooks since I’m still planning to pass on those books - and taking a photo of it.

But the time frame wasn’t now or tomorrow or the day after tomorrow or the following weeks or months. I saw myself shooting a pile of notebooks charring down with my first dSLR. That may sound materialistic but being a professional photographer is just what I want to happen and want to be right now.
Being a pro-tog is just the first step in what I really want to happen in my life. I got a lot of plans branching out after being an established pro photographer.

Reality speaking, I may not be a pro on the moment I got that dSLR but that will be a symbolic moment of change in my life.

To me, the change that I’m waiting for will begin this May.

May it is!

1 May 2 Permalink

Recalling my MOST wasted time in life.

Recalling 2nd-year college..
I was on the verge of shifting course. From BS Nursing to any Art-related course.
Now I am very disappointed that I did not. If that really happened I would probably have my own dSLR now as a compulsory requirement for photography class. I would be a 2nd year student by now, passing art projects, or anything a creative 2nd-year art student would happily do.

I’ve wasted so much of my time. 5 Years of precious time, 5, if you’ll count this year since I am “reviewing” for my “nursing licensure exam” which MOST probably will be useless to me because I won’t be working as a nurse.

“Why take the exam?”, you ask.
To satisfy the people who forced me to have this course.

Pass or Fail, I don’t care.
Only after this year, that I will be choosing what I love to do most. PHOTOGRAPHY.

• First, I will work my ass off as a call center agent, since it has high pay rate.
• work, work, work to fund my first dSLR
• work, work, work to fund additional equipments
• while self-studying/honing my skills
• work, and work and work while freelancing
• work, and work and work until stable.

HOPING the first step will be a breeze.

You are right if you’ll say, “Sacrifice. Work as a nurse, go abroad, then do what you love to do.”

Here is my answer: I can’t afford to waste another set of years…

I HOPE I can get back to this post a couple of years from now and seeing that this plan worked.

1 November 47 Permalink